Five ways to start loving yourself more TODAY.

“Great… I fucked it up…. aggggain.”

How did you feel when you read that?

Did it make you all warm and fuzzy inside? Give you the confidence to pick your head up and keep it moving?

Make you want to try whatever “IT” is again”

Yea…. Probably not.

But…..

Does it sound familiar?

Take a couple of minutes to hold yourself accountable for how you speak to yourself. Honestly, how many times during the day do we say things like this to ourselves?

Too many to count, right?

Now, would you look your best friend in the eye and say to her

“Great… You fucked it up… agggain”

Chances are you wouldn’t.

Better yet, would you sit back and let a friend look you in the face and say this to you?

Right, So why do we do it to ourselves?

If you are feeling personally attacked right now, good. Keep reading girl. This is your sign that you are in the right place.

Now that you have thought about how terrible of a friend we can be to ourselves, How do we change this thought pattern?

Because, yes…

We are the only ones who can change the way we speak to ourselves as our own inner voice is the one being such an asshole.

SELF LOVE.

This is always the answer.

Deciding that you are going to love the entire fuck out of yourself.

All your flaws… yep.. love em.

All your shortcomings… Love those too.

This is where accountability comes in handy. Being able to look at yourself and say

“Meh… I could love this about myself more.”

There are many ways to practice loving yourself, today, we will discuss my favorite way:

SELF AFFIRMATIONS!!!

I know what you’re thinking

“Stormy, what in the hell are self-affirmations”

Well, I’m so glad you asked.

Self-affirmations are defined as: the act of affirming one’s own worthiness and value as an individual for beneficial effect.

This is just a fancy way of saying- telling yourself you are worth all the good things all the time!!

Now that you know what Self-affirmations are, let us discuss why they are such an important part of learning to love yourself.

Your thoughts have so much more power than you know.

The way we speak to ourselves is a direct reflection of the way we view ourselves, just the same as the way you speak to your dog reflects the way you view him.

Changing our view of ourselves WILL be difficult and will take constant practice, at first.

But the brain is just like any other muscle, the more you work it, the stronger it gets. Eventually, it will just become natural to you.

Trust me, I know how difficult it can be. But, I believe in you, and eventually, you will believe in yourself as well.

Here are five tips to making self-affirmations as much a part of your daily life as breathing is

MAKE A LIST OF ALL THE THINGS YOU DON’T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF.

This can include physical attributes, but should also include emotional aspects such as lack of self-confidence.

This is probably going to be both the easiest step( because we can very easily point out our own flaws) And the hardest step (because you have to get pretty honest with yourself here.)

Take your time with this. If at any point your brain starts to get too assholeish, take a break.

Go outside, get some fresh air and sunshine.

Give yourself some grace here.

This exercise is not meant to pick yourself apart

TAKE YOUR LIST AND MAKE THOSE NEGATIVES INTO POSITIVES.

This is where the real fun begins.

Take a look at your list and turn those negatives things into positive.

Here is an example of one that I currently struggle with:

“I now have to start my life over at 34 years old”

Becomes

“I make healthy decisions for myself based on what I want my life to look like from this point on.”

See… It’s the same thing, only a different perspective.

Now, give it a try

MAKE THIS AFFIRMATION LIST ATTRACTIVE

For me, I refer to this list often.

When I’m having a bad day and need reminders of how amazing I think I am, I look back at this list. I know myself well enough to know that when I’m in a pissy mood I need more than a bullet list of positives to make me smile.

So it has helped me to be creative with it.

Take some time to tie-dye the page with colored pencils before making the list if that’s your thing.

Use all the glitter.

Switch colors for every letter.

Whatever it takes to assure that it won’t just be another piece of paper that gets lost in the junk drawer. Be the creative genies that you are.

Go crazy with it. It is, after all, a reflection of yourself, the more extra…. The better

REPEAT THESE AFFIRMATIONS TO YOURSELF AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE.

When you are in a shitty mood.

When someone you look to has said something that hurts your feelings.

When you find yourself talking negatively to yourself.

When you are doubting yourself.

Visualize your list.

This is where making it a creative extension of yourself comes in handy.

The more you enjoy making the list, the more the experience sticks with you, making it easier to visualize.

Remember, the brain is just like any other muscle. The more you train it, the stronger it gets. Train your brain to quickly turn those negative thoughts into affirmations.

*Side note to this -> in the beginning I would sit down in the mirror, every day. Take a few deep breathes and look myself in the mirror while repeating the affirmations I had written for myself. This was EXTREMELY uncomfortable. But today, I don’t walk past to mirror without telling myself how damn fine I look. This may help but won’t be for everyone.

Now… tip number five is probably the most important of all.

MAKE SURE THE PEOPLE YOU KEEP AROUND YOU AFFIRM THESE THINGS TO YOU AS WELL.

Remember

Above, when I asked if you would let a friend look you in the eye and tell you that you fucked “it” up again?

I want you to take that literally.

Maybe they aren’t telling you that you fucked up, but if they aren’t telling you that “You’ll do better next time” or that “Mistakes happen” they probably aren’t going to assist you on this journey and you may need to put a little space between you and them to evaluate if that person really brings much to the life you want to live.

If the answer is no, that’s okay.

There is nothing wrong with loving them from afar.

The journey back to yourself will get lonely at times, as it is an inner journey.

Once you align yourself with the frequency of self-love you will attract people who also align with that.

Just remember that not everyone gets to come with you, and that’s okay.

This is a hard concept to grasp, but you will get better at discerning who your tribe is as you fall deeper in love with yourself.

Until next time, loves. Stay safe and love yourself.