Story time
What has built Stormy Jean
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Mirror, mirror, on the wall
“Meet me at the park in twenty minutes.” My heart skipped every single time he would text this to me. The thrill of sneaking out of my office, meeting up with him, and disappearing to our secret spot to participate in my very favorite nonsexual physical activity, making out, was always a welcome surprise. It always had to be on his terms, because, well he was a busy man. Both with his respectable career and with his longtime girlfriend. So, when he could get a few free minutes in his day I happily obliged in filling that time. (I know, I know… trust me, there is nothing that you could…
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800-273-8255
“There is some allergy medicine in the bathroom cabinet, you can take one.” My new foster mother, Deanna, told me as I sneezed seventeen times in a row. Wiping my nose on the sleeve of my shirt I walked into the front bathroom that I shared with both of my sisters, Deanna’s biological daughter, and two other foster children that lived in the home. I was the newest foster child here. My sisters had lived here for a while but I was recently sent back from an adoptive placement that didn’t quite work out after I was sat down and told that I’d never see my sisters again because they…
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To myself, I promise.
The sound of my alarm clock played loudly in my ear as I blindly searched, slapping my bed sporadically hoping to hit my phone with my hand.With my free hand, I rubbed my still closed eyes, trying to massage them back to life.I blinked once.Twice.Three times, before I rolled over and scanned my immediate area, snatching the phone up, hitting snooze, and closing my eyes once more. As I lay there trying to will myself back to sleep God blessed me with reminders of the dream my alarm so rudely pulled me out of. I was on a hilltop in a beautiful white lace-trimmed skirt. Hair blowing in the wind,…
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She is better than happy. She is free
Two and a half years ago I sat face to face with the man I had spent fifteen years building a life with. I looked him dead in the eyes and listened as the explanation of his betrayal spilled from his tongue. “Stormy, I’m going to fuck her“ His eyes moved from the garage floor back to my face as if to gauge my reaction. “When I left the house, I was so mad. I was so hurt. I got dressed up and went out, fully intending to pick up some random chick, but realized.. I do not even know how to do that. So, I called her. He went…
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The day God called my angel home
My brain does a wonderful job at taking care of me. She takes my trauma, Wraps it up in bubble wrap, Tucks it away in the darkest corner and covers it in cobwebs until I am ready to clean that corner, unpack it, and put it away on the shelf of resolved issues. But not his one. She illuminates it. Especially on this day. I cannot believe it’s been twelve years. “Buzz….. Buzz, Buzz…. Buzzzzzzzzzz” My phone vibrates in my pocket as I turn toward the backseat to tend to a fussy three-year-old crying about his foot being asleep and his stomach barking at him. “Nope, I don’t have time…
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Lotus flower
“TAG!!! You’re it!!” I yelled through my laughter as I ducked out of Mrs. Williams’s rose bush, ambushing Jessi. She rolled her eyes as she spoke; “Fine, but stop cheating asshole! Or I’m going to tell your mom.” Jessi was my best friend. Really, she was my only friend. She lived right across the road from me in a house that was just as run-down as my own, with a mom that was just as consumed with her demons as my mom. Even as a 9-year-old child, Jessi didn’t follow the herd when they made fun of my greasy hair or dirty clothes, in fact, she once punched a kid…
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The meaning of Valentine’s Day
“Happy Valentine’s Day Miss Stormy!!” Donny said with all the excitement that a 9-year-old boy could possess… really, no one should be THAT excited over this stupid day. “Happy Valentine’s Day Donny“ I said with a smile, as we made our usual lap around the hallways with Bella, the school therapy dog after all the other children had scurried off to their classrooms. Donny was ATE UP with ADHD and had a mother at home who was …. Otherwise distracted… with her demons and five other boys in the mornings and would often send this child to school unmediated. Now, I’m not going to be the first person to jump…
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“I FUCKING HATE YOU!!!” “I FUCKING HATE YOU, FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART. WITH EVERYTHING THAT I HAVE. I SWEAR TO YOU, I FUCKING HAAAAAATE YOU!!” I yelled through gritted teeth and salty tears, slinging my arms around with balled fists in a dramatic display of hatred. All of the words, that up until this point, had been unsaid. All the tears left uncried. All the emotions that I had not allowed my heart to feel…OH I felt them now. It was as if someone had finally lifted the lid off of a pressure cooker. All of it. Years of it. What felt like lifetimes of pain, bubbling up…