Ten ways to get out of your own damn head.

I recently came across a quote that I felt compelled to share with you guys today. When I read these words on my phone screen I immediately got goosebumps as something about it resonated deep in my soul. I could not believe that I had not thought about this before. I also could not believe that with the many years I spent in therapy, the countless hours I spent describing my symptoms, the many different medications I had put into my body, the many words of advice I received I had never heard these words before.

“Anxiety is simply living in the future and depression is simply living in the past.

The cure- living in the present.”

As someone who struggles with both anxiety and depression regularly, I felt attacked by this at first glance.

You’re telling me that I am the cause of my anxiety and depression?  

That somehow I have created this curse for myself? 

But the more I thought about it, the more sense it made.

Of course, anxiety and depression are REAL ASS THINGS and they seem out of our control.

The feelings and sensations that come along with it are HEAVY, to say the least. Many circumstances create feelings of anxiety and depression. These circumstances are not something that we can control.

However- choosing to unpack our bags and live in the fear of the future (anxiety) or the hurt of the past (depression) is just that.

A choice. 

One that we actively chose to make.

Now- I’m in no way saying that feelings of fear or hurt should not be felt. These are quite common human feelings.

If it is there, feel it.

Say hello to it, understand why you’re feeling it, heal it, and let it go.

Do not sit and let the would puss and bleed out until it is infected.

This is when we slip into prolonged episodes of anxiety and depression which both have lasting effects on our mental, spiritual and physical health.

So.

Now that we have talked about why we are responsible for our thoughts.

How do we control it?

Great question.

Mindfulness is the basic human ability to be fully present and aware of where you are and what you’re doing, not overly reactive or overwhelmed by what is going on around us. 

As someone who is constantly in my head, this has been a very difficult concept for me to grasp.

If you’re anything like me, you find yourself lost in your thoughts more often than not.

You find yourself remembering arguments you had 6 years ago, regretting not saying something that may have changed the outcome of that conversation. Recalling embarrassing moments from the past that keep you from trying things again for fear that they will end up the same way.

You practice conversations that have not happened yet and hurt your feelings with made-up scenarios that probably will never be an actual thing.

I finally got tired of my own shit and decided to pay attention to things that help to pull me out of my thoughts and practice feeling joy for the moment I am in.

Something that I have come to realize is that the more cluttered the mind is, the harder it is to see clearly.  

So- if you are also tired of your own shit, I encourage you to keep reading.

Below I have compiled a list of ten things I have found that help keeps me grounded in the present moment. These are in no particular order and on particularly stressful days I have to spend time doing several of these.

GET OUTSIDE 

Life hurts. Nature heals.

Fresh air is good for the mind and sunshine is good for the soul. So take a few minutes, or the whole weekend and soak it up.

Take your shoes off and walk in the grass to help ground yourself in Mother Earth.

Soak up all the good vibes of the sunshine.

People watch in the park.

Grab a friend and have a picnic or a hike.

Plant a flower or start a garden.

Stargaze.

Look at the moon.

Play in the rain.

Taking time to find the beauty that naturally surrounds us is sure to bring you back to the present moment and fill your heart with gratitude.

This brings us to number two.

BE GRATEFUL

I have trained my brain to find a reason to be grateful for any and all situations that occur in my life. From the small to the huge. There is a reason to be grateful.

When you learn to be grateful for what you have or what you have lost it helps remind you of all the wonderful things that you have in your life.

The more you practice this, the more your brain will do it on its own, which will naturally reduce the occurrence of anxiety and depression.

TAKE A BATH

For me, this is a whole ritual. The prepping of the bathtub, setting the intention of the bath, and bringing myself back to the present moment is just as important as the self-care the soaking in the bubbles brings to me.

(If you would like a post on my ritual baths, let me know.)

The bathtub seems to be a portal to clearer thoughts for me.

But it doesn’t matter if you go through a ritual as I do, if you sit and read the backs of the shampoo bottles or you pretend you’re a mermaid, water has healing properties.

Use them.

WRITE IT OUT

This is my favorite way to clear my mind. I am a journal whore. At any given moment you can find 543 random journals lying around my house. My journal is my therapist, my best friend, and my first love. It doesn’t matter if you use a journal prompt to get you started on what to write if you sit down and empty your brain onto the paper, or you sit down and write a book.

Just write.

Just put pen to paper and let the shit go.

You are safe here. Write what you feel.

A good brain dump can help you to sort your thoughts out, clearing up space in your mind to truly be present at the moment.

*If you would like a post on some great journal prompts to help you get started…. Let me know!

ACTS OF SERVICE

This one can be tricky. People who struggle with anxiety are usually apt to be people pleasers. We learned this at an incredibly early age and naturally lean toward giving to others before we give to ourselves.

This is where we learn to put boundaries around our acts of service.

If you do not have the energy to give to anyone at this moment.

Don’t.

If you are giving from a place of getting praise in return or if you feel pressured by someone to give.

Don’t.

The acts of service I am talking about are the ones that make you feel as though you have made a difference, not where you feel pressured to do so.

Please use your discernment here and stay firm in your boundaries.

At the end of the day, giving to others has become a way that I can get outside of my thoughts. This may work for you as well.

GET MOVING 

Go for an intentional walk around the block, making sure to notice whatever God puts in your path to notice.

Have an early morning jog.

Google beginners Yoga on YouTube and get your stretch on.

Lift heavy shit repeatedly until you sweat out the bad juju.

Whatever movement you enjoy at whatever level you are at. Do that, and do it often. Exercise stimulates the production of endorphins and the release of feel-good chemicals such as adrenaline, serotonin, and dopamine which naturally decrease feelings of fear and sadness.

So- get you some of that good stuff!!!!

GET THINGS DONE 

When you are being productive and focusing on checking things off your to-do list will keep you in the present moment and also reduce the anxiety that procrastination brings.

Killing two birds with one stone.

So, rage clean the kitchen, pack up and donate those clothes, catch up on that documentation from work, make that to-do list, catch up on that laundry.

Do it today so that you don’t have to worry about it tomorrow.

SPEND TIME DOING A HOBBY

What do you enjoy doing? Not the things you pretend to like when you spend time with your friends. Not what your kids are into. Not what your partner likes to do.

What do YOU like to do?

Spend some time doing that.

Read a book.

Play in the dirt with your flowers or vegetables.

Play the video game you enjoy.

Color a picture.

Draw a picture.

Write the poem.

Write the book.

Knit the blanket.

Binge the Netflix show.

Whatever you like to do- Do that.

All-day.

And nothing more.

UGLY CRY IT OUT

Much like a good brain dump.. a good ugly cry can be just the release that you need.

There Is no shame in the need to cry. This does not make you weak nor should you be ashamed of this. Some of the most profound epiphanies I have had have come after a good ugly cry.

Emotions, when not properly expressed will become stuck in the body, crying is an amazing release.

Feel what you need to feel.

Cry the shit out.

Let it go and be done with it.

GIVE YOURSELF GRACE 

Take some time to celebrate where you are today and the journey you have been on to get you here. Take a good look at yourself in the mirror and remind yourself that you are a human who makes mistakes and feels things deeply. This is your magic.

Some people go their entire lives and never get to the privilege of feeling some of the emotions that you get to feel daily.

Give yourself grace and love.

You are amazing.

These, of course, are just a few of the many ways to practice mindfulness.

If you have any that you enjoy or that work particularly well for you, please leave them in the comments as this space was created to help each other grow and I am always looking for creative, outside-to-box ideas to assist me in my growth.